Photo copyright Jonathon Hoxmark on Unsplash

Perfection is overrated. Flaws are interesting, and often difficult, and sometimes toxic.

It is easy to run from flaws in others or leave flawed situations, seeking something that feels better or isn’t as hard to deal with.

If the truth is told, the flaws within us (you me them everybody) are as jarring and offputting as the flaws of others are to us (you me them everybody).


I realize that running from flawed situations to places of sunlight and easy daffodil meadows is the story of my life. I never learned to deal with difficult conversations or uncomfortable ideas. Not as a child and not as a young adult. I didn’t consciously think the grass was greener on the other side so I must metaphorically sell my house and move, but that is the pattern I found myself in.

It could be excused away as Mom-brain; finding flaws in our children so we can correct them and raise them into good humans.

It could be excused away as Manager-brain; correcting errors in others so they will work better for the organization.

It could be excused away as Editor-brain; years of my life spent scrubbing documents for the tinniest of flaws, aiming for perfection.

I could be that in looking at the flaws of others I never need to look at the flaws of myself.


I need to look at the flaws in myself for a number of reasons.

  1. Mind my business. No one cares about me and my business but they get very upset when I am in their business looking for flaws.
  2. Improve myself i.e. don’t be such an asshole.
  3. Forgive myself for being a flawed human. If I can justify, explain, accept, and forgive the flaws in others, I can do the same for myself.
  4. Help me set boundaries. Both to keep others from infringing upon me, and to keep myself from infringing upon others.
  5. Allow myself grace to work on this process each and every day, knowing that nothing changes overnight.
  6. Strive for being excellent instead of being perfect.


Bold question … what is one flaw within yourself that you would like to acknowledge?